I Didn’t Know Your Husband Had Died 

I Didn’t Know Your Husband Had Died

Earlier this year I attended a high school concert that my son was in.  While we were waiting for the event to start, I struck up a conversation with one of the moms that I had met during tennis season earlier this year.  We chatted about the boy’s success with their school year and about how much we missed tennis and the families that were involved.  


I shared with this mom how much tennis really helped Seth and I through this past summer.    I shared with her that I had lost my husband right before conditioning for   tennis season had started and that it was tennis that gave me a reason to leave the house.  I was thankful that I had someplace to be.  She looked at me shocked and said “I am so sorry.  I didn’t know that you had lost your husband.”  


My response almost took her aback.  I said “Good! I am glad you didn’t know that I had lost Michael.  That means I am doing my job of keeping things normal.” 

Years ago, one of my 1st bosses taught me to check my attitude at the door.  He would say “when you walk through that salon door you leave your personal problems outside.  Guests of the salon want it to be all about them not about you.” I have always run my personal and professional life that way.  I try and check my attitude at the door. 


This was later confirmed when Michael and I had the opportunity to attend the Disney Institute on Leadership.  They shared with us they every cast member is prompted by the phrase “IT’S SHOWTIME!”  before embarking on their work day at the Walt Disney World Parks. They leave their troubles outside the park gates and are reminded that they work at the happiest place on earth.  The cast members’ job is to create a positive experience for every park guest they encounter.    We have adopted this with our Hello Gorgeous! Team.  We use “It’s Showtime!” to ready us for all of our events.  

I am not saying that I don’t have my moments or bad days, because I do.  I cry and I have hopeless feelings but I remember the promise I made to Michael before they airlifted him to Indiana University Hospital.  I promised him I would keep going. What good would it do if I spent my days moping around because I lost the love of my life.  I choose to remember how lucky I am that I had the opportunity to love my soulmate for 23 ¾ years.   Every day I get up, I get dressed and get myself ready and put 1 foot in front of the other and continue to move forward and keep my promise to Michael.   And I take it as a compliment when people are unaware of my loss.  I am doing my job by honoring Michael in everything that I do.