I Should Be Somewhere Else Today

I Should Be Somewhere Else Today

Today would have been my 25th wedding anniversary.  I feel jipped in so many ways!!!  I didn’t ask to be here.  I didn’t request to be a widow.  As a matter of fact, I played by all of the rules, love honor and cherish, especially the “in sickness and in health” line.   I loved my husband more than words can ever say.  

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We had always talked about how we would celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary.  It brings tears to my eyes to think that today I am not on that amazing cruise we talked of taking together to celebrate our life together.  I will celebrate our anniversary by visiting Michael’s grave site.   I get so angry sometimes.  I miss him so much!!!  It wasn’t supposed to be this way.  We defined the end of our love story.  Our life would end together going 100 MPH in our red Maserati on the autobahn when I was 90 years old and he was 96.   It’s not supposed to be this way!!!    

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But the fact is that it is this way. I am a widow.   I am here and Michael is not.  I am angry, but I choose to celebrate the life we had.  I choose to look at the 23 ¾ years we were married as a gift.  I was remembering the 1st song we danced to at our wedding.  It was a song by Queen called “One Year Of Love” The 1st line of the song says “Just One Year of Love is Better Than a Lifetime Alone.”  I never realized how true that is until now.  I am so grateful for the 23 ¾ years we had together and what I learned from the years I was able to be Mrs. Michael Becker.  I understand that some people go their entire lives and never  have the opportunity to be loved the way Michael loved me.  

I decided to celebrate this milestone anniversary by remembering the 25 things I learned by being married to the love of my life.   Take care of the ones you love and the ones that love you.  Be grateful for what you are learning from all of life’s lessons even the hard ones.  

The 25 things I learned from being married to Michael

  1. I learned to laugh
  2. I learned to laugh at myself
  3. I learned to trust my gut
  4. I leaned to never give up
  5. I learned that every day IS a good day
  6. I learned to be loved
  7. I learned everything is going to be ok
  8. I learned that failure isn’t an option
  9. I learned to always be nice
  10. I learned to love with my whole heart
  11. I learned how to be loved
  12. I learned to be selfless
  13. I learned to find the joy in the little things
  14. I learned to live like I was dying
  15. I learned to stop and enjoy a good sunset
  16. I learned to be grateful for everything, even the bad stuff
  17. I learned to be patient
  18. I learned “You can’t go back”
  19. I learned “You can’t love somebody that kisses your butt”
  20. I learned to “make a decision”, and if its not the right decision, you make another decision
  21. I learned “I am fearfully and wonderfully made”
  22. I learned to be a better person
  23. I learned things can always be fixed
  24. I learned to persevere
  25. I learned that there is such a thing a true love and that I experienced it.